10 Money Facts About Thanksgiving
If you've ever wondered how much it would cost to build a giant balloon version of yourself and enter it in the Macy's Day parade, then you've come to the right place, ya weirdo.
Thanksgiving! A time to be thankful. And to eat. And to read weird money facts about Thanksgiving.
However you decide to ingest these facts is up to you. Do you want to use them to get your appetite worked up? Or would you rather read them after you’ve eaten to help digest?
Alternatively, you could read five facts before the meal and then attempt to read the rest afterward but fall asleep before you can finish.
Whatever you do, we recommend that you avoid reading them at the Thanksgiving table. That would be rude. Unless it keeps you from getting into an argument with that one cousin. You know the one.
1. The Turkey Terror.
Around 45 to 46 million turkeys are killed for Thanksgiving in America each year. That accounted for around 18 percent of the 244.5 million turkeys raised in the United States in 2017.
While those all sound like big numbers, it doesn’t come close to the numbers of chickens raised in America each year. Nearly 9 billion chickens were raised in 2017.
It makes sense, really. You have to have turkey during Thanksgiving. It’s tradition. But … come on. We all know chicken is better. It’s far moister. It’s tastier. You don’t have to study ancient traditions passed down through the ages to find out how to cook it in a way that remains edible. There are only two reasons to eat turkey: Because it’s Thanksgiving or because you don’t think you deserve chicken.
If you disagree, feel free to speak up in the comments. Oh, there is no comment section? Whoops!
2. Let them eat expensive Thanksgiving dinner.
We recently wrote about how you can save on your Thanksgiving feast, but maybe you don’t have trouble affording Thanksgiving dinner. Maybe you have so much money, you’re actually bored of spending it in responsible ways. Well, then have we got the Thanksgiving dinner for you!
Their 2017 menu cost $76,000. The meal was for ten people (or one very hungry cartoon illustration of a spherical pig with a top hat and monocle) and came with more than just food. Included in the extras were tickets to Hamilton, two nights in a luxury hotel, a limo to take you wherever you want to go for two days, guided tours, and a $20,000 watch. So … the actual food probably only cost like $40,000 at the most. What a bargain!
And what was that food? Among other pricey items was Wagyu beef with peppercorn sauce made from $4,800-a-bottle Louis XIII cognac, sweet potatoes with caviar, and a very expensive turkey. Did any of it actually taste good enough to be worth the price? Probably not, but that isn’t really the point, is it?
3. Ballooning costs.
Have you ever been watching the Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade and wished you could see yourself as balloon flying over New York?
No? Uh … well, we definitely haven’t either. But we looked up how much it would cost… for your benefit, because we just thought you’d want to know.
Those balloons cost around $100,000 to make and it’ll cost you another $90,000 to get it admitted into the parade. So as long as you hold on tight, you’ll only have to pay the $90,000 fee for every year after the first one.
Dragon Ball’s Goku will be joining Garfield and the Pillsbury Doughboy this year, so they can all fight to see who the most powerful balloon is.
4. Out of the fryer and into the fire.
Do you know which day has the most home fires? Well, given the title of the list you’re reading, you probably won’t be surprised to find out that it’s Thanksgiving.
The culprit? People attempting to deep fry their entire turkey. Maybe don’t try this. In 2016, fire departments across America had to respond to 1,570 home cooking fires.
Sorry, but you’ll just have to find another secret technique to make turkey edible.
5. Hit the road.
48.5 million Americans are expected to get in their cars to drive to their Thanksgiving destination this year. So expect some traffic. Or you could just fly. Except that …
6. Hit the sky.
4.27 million people are expected to fly to their Thanksgiving destination this year. So whether you’re on the road or in the airport, you’re going to have to deal with a lot of other people. Maybe you can just unilaterally declare that Thanksgiving will be at your place … But then you’ll have to actually prepare the food. It’s quite the cornucopia conundrum.
7. Black Friday.
Black Friday can be chaotic. We’ve already told you how you can plan your purchases to avoid overspending, but how do other Americans fare? Last year over 174 million Americans shopped online and in stores during the weekend after Thanksgiving. That’s a lot of saving and potential trampling! Except for the online shoppers. That’s just cyber trampling.
8. Black Friday: Millennial Edition.
Millennials seem to be killing everything these days. From diamonds to mortgages to the lottery, nothing is safe from the Millennials’ wrath. Surely these dastardly Millennials are also killing Black Friday, right?
Wrong! Older Millennials were actually the biggest Black Friday/Cyber Monday spenders last year, spending $419.52 on average per person.
To be fair, that number probably has a lot to do with the way the National Retail Federation groups Black Friday and Cyber Monday spending together, since we’ve heard that Millennials are killing brick and mortar retailers.
9. Oh, cranberries!
Americans just love our cranberries! We consume 400 million pounds of them per year, probably by just popping them into our mouths one by one. However, when it comes to Thanksgiving, you gotta have the cranberry sauce, which is why every year Americans buy 20% of those 400 million cranberries in the week leading up to Thanksgiving.
10. Are you ready for some Cowboys?!
Sadly the Dallas Cowboys just don’t get a rest on Thanksgiving. They always play a Thanksgiving game, and it’s always the most watched bout of the NFL regular season.
Last year, however, ratings took a dip, due to a contract dispute between Dish Network and CBS that left millions of potential viewers unable to watch.
Now those are some facts to be thankful for! Eat up, and read up!
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